InuYasha Crack Fics
by LeeshaVamp
Summary: A collection of Inuyasha stories I wrote when I was little. Used to post them individually, but now I've combined them. R
1. Attack of The ExGirlfriends

Attack of the ex girlfriends

{Feudal Japan} "Sango have you talked to Ayame yet?" questioned Kagome "yep, what about you and Kikyo are you too going to call it a truss?" asked Sango "yes but, only for that night then we're back to being our usual feuding and fighting. But that's all we'll need." "After this they will never dis respect us agine." {Days later} "Say Inuyasha, can we talk?" asked Kagome. "Sure, what about?" "Well since sango and miroku are gone for the weekend how about we go back to my era? And besides I have a surprise for you!" answered Kagome. "Like what?" questioned Inuyasha? "If I told you it wouldn't be a surprise! Fine." *Sighs* {some where in Japan} " miroku how about you and I go to the slayers village for the weekend, and it's not like Inuyasha and kagome are going to need us so how bout it?" asked sango "sure as long as I am with you," *rubs sango's butt* sango ignores it and laughs.

{Somewhere else} "Finally lost ayame, man she can run!" said koga *breaths heavily* "KOGA!?" "Damnit she found me" " Koga it's me kagome, where are you?" "KAGOME, so we meet agine how I have counted the moments in till we meet." Said Koga. "Hey where's the mutt face at anyway?" "Oh, koga that inu trasha and I got in to another fight and I really need someone to talk to." Said kagome I know, meet me in the village by the Inuyasha forest, I have a surprise for you! "

{Hours later}"kagome, why do I have to wear this stinking blind fold?" asked Inuyasha. "Because I don't want you to see any thing yet!"{Somewhere else} "Sango where exactly are we going?" "You'll see." "But I can't see I am blindfolded all I see is black." said miroku. {Village} " Where's kagome she's not one to be late?" said koga

{Somewhere else} we are here but just a couple more minutes. * Knocks Inuyasha to the floor* "hey why did you tie me up!" exclaimed Inuyasha. {Couple of miles away} "Hey …watch it…that hurts …why did you tie me up and will you take the stinking blindfold off all ready!!" said miroku. "Oh hi sango was it easy enough for you?" said kagome "sango, miroku is that you? Untie me!" said Inuyasha. " I would if I could." *comes through door dragging the out concuss koga by collar* "did we miss the party?" said ayame. "Remove their blindfolds!" yelled kagome "you have all be gathered here for one reason, pay back." said sango "here's how it's going to work Inuyasha vs. kikyo and I" said kagome "ayame and koga time for a little quality time." "And to finish it off, miroku you are going to spend some quality time with sango and every other woman you've hit on" *sango smiles evilly* "wait that's not fair!" screamed miroku "maybe for you but for us it's just peachy." *All girl start surrounding them* "GET THEM!!!" "AHHHHH!!!"

THE END for now at least = ^ . ^=

Anime Freak


	2. Obedience School Revenge

Obedience school {street} Inu yasha- kagome! Why do I have to go to this thing of yours? Kagome –obedience school and I said so. Besides, it will do you good. Look we are here I will see you in an hour. Inu yasha – what an hour!? Are you crazy? Wait, where are you going get back here! Well let's get this over with. Deep voice #1– hello inu yasha class is in section Inu yasha- what who are you? Where the others? Deep voice #2-there are no others it was a trap mutt! Such a fool! Inu yasha- Wait, only one good for nothing wolf demon calls me mutt! Koga is that you? Koga – well mutt long time no see. Inu yasha – Okay Koga who's your accomplices, your way to stupid to do this alone. Sessomaru-It is I your older brother sessomaru. Inu yasha – what in the hell are you doing here? Sessomaru – to finally finish you off for good! Koga – and when your out of the picture kagome will be all mine Inu yasha – what about Ayame?

Koga –well am … Sessomaru – enough talk lets get back to the lesson plan. How about the basic sit even you should know that one.

Inu yasha – ha good luck only kagome can make me sit. Koga – even I know that, that's…. Inu yasha – that's surprising you couldn't even find your way out of a paper bag. Koga –as I was saying that is why we have this, a recording of kagome. Inu yasha- you wouldn't dare. Recording – Inu yasha sit!! Inu yasha – aahhh

{Kagome's house} kagome- I wonder how Inu yasha is doing?

{School} Inu yasha- kagome how could you do this to me? Ding dong sessomaru- what do you know time really does fly when your having

Inu yasha- you call this fun? I am out of here.

Kagome-hey inu yasha how was class?

Inu yasha - Great.

Kagome-good cause you will be there for three more weeks.

Inu yasha- 3 weeks! This is going to be a nightmare

= ^. ^ =

Anime Freak


	3. Crazy People

Crazy people the Inuyasha story

Kagome's mom comes up to Kagome and says "Kagome we need to have a talk!" and Kagome starts freaking out…she's looking left to right and starts sweating like "OMG I am in oots of trouble" so kagome's mom sits her down and with a serious face says "KAGOME!" and kagome is freaking out as her mom says "I got you a phone!" and kagome being freaked out sighs in relief and get excited! And starts screaming how happy she is! So she runs out the door without saying goodbye and picks up her phone and says "sorry mom, bye!" and hangs up, she's so into her phone she doesn't realize where she's running! In addition, runs strait into Hojo and being as small as she is falls down, "Oh Kagome! Are you all right?" Kagome does not acknowledge Hojo, gets up, and runs to class.

After school Kagome races out and not paying attention again runs into Inuyasha, and Inuyasha ask Kagome why she's so worked up and Kagome says "I GOT A PHONE I FINALLY GOT A PHONE!" ((She's flipping the cover up down while saying that)) she's not paying attention and doesn't realize Inuyasha had taken her phone! And accidentally breaks the cover off, Kagome was devastated she is so mad at Inuyasha she just grabs her thing and jumps down the well and Inuyasha follows her.

At the feudal era Kagome is stomping around as Sango walks up to her and asks what's the matter and kagome and sango walk off as Kagome blurts out the whole thing, "Uhhh, Kagome? What's a phone again?" and Kagome explains it to Sango once more " Oh! I see so it's something you communicate with from any distance you want?" "Something like that" kagome says. "Inuyasha is such a JERK!" Kagome blurts out! As Inuyasha pops out of the bushes and says "I AM NOT A JERK!" Kagome already being super mad at Inuyasha gets even madder! INUYASHA! Sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit sit! Until there is a hole so deep that no one could jump out of it! Shippo comes up and looks in and shakes his head, miroku isn't paying attention and falls right into the whole on top of Inuyasha and the hole was tiny so Inuyasha and miroku are smack up to each other and randomly says "Miroku don't make it weird….", then suddenly Kagome starts throwing everything in sight at them and hits Miroku and Inu Yasha! And Kagome covers the hole with a giant rock, Inuyasha flips his long silvery hair and acts like a girl…and Miroku pets Inuyasha's ears….

The next day Sango and Kagome think it's fair to let them out of the hole and are mortified when they saw what was down there…. Inuyasha and Miroku are up against each other naked!!!! Kagome is screaming bloody murder and so is Sango in the fetal position sucking her thumb, we all knows where this is going! INUYASHA! SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT! Making the hole deeper and waking both of them up!" WHAT THE HELL!?!?!!" both of them cover up and get out of the whole and put there cloths on.

Shippo, Inuyasha, and Miroku are sitting around the camp fire as Shippo says "I'm gonna go look for the girls" and he quickly runs behind the bushes, multiplies, and transforms into Sango and Kagome naked and then walks out and poses in front of Inuyasha and Miroku as their jaws drop and stare, wait this isn't Kagome! Kagome wouldn't get naked in front of me! Oh Sango would for me! Says Miroku, as kagome and sango walk up and start saying OH MY GOSH! As they say "wait this isn't Inuyasha and miroku's fault…. IT'S SHIPPO'S!" as Sango retrieves the Hiraikotsu, Kagome grabs her bow, Inuyasha draws his sword, and Miroku gets his wind tunnel ready, as they all attack and miroku says " we can clean all this up with the wind tunnel, so there's no proof of a murder!" And no one ever knew.

The End… = ^ .^ =

Anime Freak


	4. Bizarre

Another crazy bizarre Inuyasha story.

"Say Inuyasha…" questioned Sota "is there any demons in this time?" kagome walks in the room with drinks and a school book. " what are you two talking about?" asked Kagome. "Oh, I was just asking Inuyasha if there are any demons in this era." Responded Sota. "Yeah are there any demons in this era?" kagome repeated sota's questioned, "Well just what I was about to tell sota that there are demons in this era, infact their demons macerating as teacher's in your schools." Said Inuyasha acting very proud of him days later kagome was still wondering about what Inuyasha said about the demons in her era on her way to school. "Class, class, settle down." Said the principle "today you will have a sub in P.E due to your coaches absents. So let me introduce . "A familiar man walked in to sight. The girls giggled and talked about the man about how cute he was. It suddenly hit kagome that it was sesshomaru who was this so-called Mr. Yeshobe. So Inuyasha wasn't joking around about demon in this era but there was something different about sesshomaru he seemed kinder in a way. Kagome wasn't paying much attention to sesshomaru aka but more to the fact that he wasn't acting mean toward the girl she thought that sesshomaru hated human well it has been 500 years since the feudal era, he could change in that time.

After school kagome went to talk to the so-called sub and ask about his past to see what he had to say .she couldn't find him anywhere. " It's been awhile since the wedding kagome…"said a voice from be hind her .She turned to see who it was talking to her. It was sesshomaru! " … What wedding" asked kagome " don't you remember your own wedding?" sesshomaru said with a questioned look? "But…I am not married I am only 15! Answered kagome "Oh and speaking of my brother. How is he?" asked sesshomaru. " WHAT!!!!!!!!"

"WHY THE HELL ARE YOU HERE!?" exclaimed Inuyasha "clam down Inuyasha, he's just here to talk ok?" said kagome " yes. Inu yasha listen to your future wife." said sesshomaru with a smirk "what a second you're saying that kagome and I are married?" Inuyasha questioned sesshomaru. "Yes but, not in this time. Back in the feudal era you are married I even attended." said sesshomaru "Inuyasha? Have you ever had the thought of marrying me?" kagome said in a serious voice. "aaa…I think some one is calling me!" Inuyasha said as he dashed out the door and down the street as kagome chases after him " I what some answers now Inuyasha!!" yelled kagome.


	5. Oo Twitch

How many more of these crazy stories I am going to write?

" Inuyasha, please can we go to the fair?" whined kagome. " No! We still have look for the sacred jewel shards! Or have we forgotten all about Naraku and the jewel!" responded Inuyasha in a flustered voice. "Why not? We've been through a lot lately and I think it would be fun." Kagome said trying to get him to under stand. " You know Inuyasha, I could use a break I almost threw my arm out of socket in that last battle… it did take a lot out of all of us and a break sounds nice." said Sango "Nice try Sango but we can't stay we have to keep going." said Inuyasha. "Well I am going! Come sango we will go with out those losers!" said kagome-taking sango with her to the fair. "Aahhh she gets on my last nerve! Fine go to the little fair forget all about the jewel that you broke!" Inuyasha said calling after them. "Poor Inuyasha…" said Miroku acting sympathetic toward Inuyasha. "…Come let us get a drink and calm down plus we couldn't just leave the girls behind." "Fine I will have just one drink." Answered Inuyasha.

{Several drinks later} " You know Miroku, Kagome is really HOTT! I didn't just say hott I mean really hott!" said Inuyasha who was obviously drunk. "Bar keep another round please." "Inuyasha I think you should cut back a little." Warned Miroku "yeah I think your right, lets go see the girls I have a couple things to say to kagome." Inuyasha said.

"Wow that fun sango I am so glad we went alone with out the guys they would have spoiled every thing!" kagome said choking down some food "yes that was fun." Responded sango "KAGOME!!! WE HAVE TO TALK!!!!" exclaimed Inuyasha "yes, what do you need to talk to me about?" asked kagome "KAGOME…. I love you." "Huh?" kagome went to shock from the news as Inuyasha started spilling his guts. "Miroku am I a dog?" asked Inuyasha still drunk. "Yes if you're thinking technically."  
Answered miroku. "Good then I can do this." Inuyasha dives at Miroku's leg and starts humping it. "AAAHHHH INUYASHA GET OFF OF ME!!!" yelped miroku. Sango and Kagome start laughing so hard that there eyes are watering

The next day Inuyasha wakes up with a hang over and miroku is missing. "My head hurts and where's miroku?" asked Inuyasha. "Uhhh…" said kagome. "Kagome what exactly happened?" kagome tells Inuyasha what happened and he runs off to the lake and splashes around trying to clean him self off then starts cursing his head off "miroku I am going to kill you how could you take me to that god damn bar!!!!"

= ^ .^=

Anime Freak


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